Sunday, February 28, 2010

Moe's Birth Story

On Wednesday, I had an appointment with Dr. S., and he determined that my blood pressure was higher than normal. Since I'd just nicked the side mirror on the way to the appointment, it was possible that was the cause. He asked me to come back the next day to recheck. So on Thursday at about 11:00, I was checked again, and the blood pressure was still too high. He said I would need to be induced within the next 48 hours. Staggered, I asked for a second opinion. Dr. H. was able to see me about 45 minutes later, and he explained everything to me really well and said that in medical terms, this was pretty much a no-brainer. Induction, and soon. 

Bundy was pretty floored, as he prides himself on being prepared for everything, and we were feeling distinctly unprepared for this. He left work and we met back at home at about 3:00 pm. At about 4:00 pm, the phone rang - it was the Civic, offering us a spot that evening. We asked for 15 minutes to think about it, and decided that whether this happened now or later, it was going to happen, so we'd better just do it. We called back, and they told us to come in for about 6:00 pm. We both showered and ate, and showed up at the Civic with our bags. 

And a good thing, too. Because when you're induced for pre-eclampsia, they want you to stay there the whole time. Our birth room was fantastic - so nice and large, and with a lovely and inviting tub. They hooked up the fetal heart rate monitor to me almost right away, and at about 8:00 pm, they administered prostaglandin gel to start the induction. I was able to sleep until about 2:00 am, when they gave me a second dose. Not a whole lot had happened in the meantime - my cervix had started to prepare itself, I'd had some cramping, but nothing major. Bundy remembers waking up around 2:00 am and seeing three people around me that he'd never seen before, and they were performing a rather painful and traumatic exam. He jumped up and got by my side pretty darn quick. They broke my water, which meant the clock was now ticking - if I didn't give birth within a certain amount of time, they'd do a c-section. No one said that, but we knew. 

After that second dose of prostaglandin, actual contractions began, but quite slowly. We could see them on the contraction monitor. At 8:00 am, they started oxytocin by IV at 7 ml an hour. They got me on the wireless fetal heart rate and contraction monitor, and around 11:00 am, I got into the bathtub to labour there. I stayed there for two hours, and the contractions were getting stronger and stronger. Bundy and the nurse, Julie, put pressure on my back - I was having back labour. Julie was concerned that this might mean the baby was facing the wrong way (he was head down, but facing the wrong way). At about 1:30 pm, the contractions were strong and steady enough that Bundy called his mom to come in to be with us. 

We were trying a variety of poses. I was using the yoga ball, I leaned on the bed, I threw myself into Bundy's arms in something called "slow dance pose". But by 3:00 pm, it was time for an epidural. I was getting worn out, and the contractions weren't progressing. I was 4 cm. 

The epidural was no picnic. Bundy stayed in the room, and faced me, while the anesthesiologist prepped my back. I was sitting upright on the bed. He injected a freezing, and then began administering the epidural right away. Well, I wasn't frozen, so I screamed. He told me I shouldn't be feeling anything, but I begged to differ. Bundy just about jumped over the bed, and only barely resisted saying, "She screams again and I jam that needle into your spine." The second attempt went a bit better, and as the epidural took effect, I was able to sleep. I slept until about 5:00 pm, and that couple of hours of rest made quite a difference.

At 5:00 pm, they checked me again and I was 4.5 cm. 

We watched Firefly on the laptop, we listened to mellow music. Bundy joked that as he was wearing his Yoda t-shirt, and I was drinking raspberry leaf tea out of my Star Trek Experience mug, and we were watching Firefly, Moe was likely resisting coming out because his parents were just so darn geeky. 

Throughout that afternoon, from about 3:00 pm to 6:00 pm, we tried different positions to get the baby moving and facing the right way. I spent a great deal of time in Child's Pose, which I knew from yoga, but with my bum right in the air. At 7:00 pm, our awesome nurse Julie left, and Beth replaced her. Beth was more aloof, but knew her stuff. 

At 8:00 pm, Dr. A. came in and checked me again. She checked me in a slightly different position, and declared that I was now actually 9 cm. "SHUT UP!" I exclaimed. (Why is it that I seem to say that at all these important moments, like when I was told I was pregnant?) 

I rested up until about 11:00 pm; there was little progress and the contractions, while strong, weren't terribly steady. As the clock was ticking down from when they broke my water, they said it was time to start pushing. 

It took me a few tries to get the hang of it - three years of yoga training has taught me never to hold my breath when exerting myself, which is what you have to do to push. But I figured it out, and was able to use the squat bar. (I marveled at how the epidural removed the pain, but left the pressure, and I was still able to move my legs.) I pushed until 12:45 am, when Dr. A. came back in and reached inside me and managed to turn him around. She told me I could push for another 15 minutes, but then we'd have to change tactics. I knew what that meant - an emergency c-section. My contractions were still really sporadic, but I kept pushing with each one, as hard as I could. 

She came back in at 1:00 am, ready to tell me that it was time for the c-section, but saw the progress I was making. She said we'd use the vacuum, and I had three contractions to show her I could do this before we'd move ahead with the section. They attached the vacuum (which wasn't at all what I thought it was) at 1:03 am, and at 1:08 am (three contractions later), our son was born. We had escaped the c-section by minutes. 

He didn't cry, so they took him to give him some oxygen, but he was fine, he just wasn't crying. That was ok, I was crying enough for everyone. My whole body was wracked with sobs - six years of emotion rushed through me and I sobbed my heart out. The doctor kept telling me he was fine, and I said, "You don't understand! It's been six years!" Bundy cried a little, too, and held me and told me what an amazing job I had done. As soon as I got to hold Moe, I fell madly in love with him. He was perfect, he was beautiful, and he was ours. I barely noticed them sewing me up as I just stared at him and held him close to me. 

They weighed him and he was 6lbs, 3oz. 

It was only afterwards that Bundy told me that at the very moment he was born, the song "Thank You" by Natalie Merchant was playing. That's our song, and the fact that it played as our son came into the world was just magical.



Thursday, February 25, 2010

Dear Moe - Welcome to the World!

There are no words to describe how much we are ridiculously in love with you.

It has been an eventful few days, my love. We thought we'd have a few more weeks until you joined us, but the doctors decided it was time to bring you out because of my blood pressure. So you were induced on Thursday night (a week ago tonight!), and you came out early on Saturday morning. (You are a Baconfest Baby!) I'll write you the story of how you were born sometime in the next little while, but it suffices to say that we were in love with you from the moment we saw you.

I call you my little pigeon because of the adorable cooing noises you make. You didn't cry for 12 hours, only breaking your silence when we gave you a bath. Daddy was quite relieved to hear your voice for the first time.

We struggled quite a bit with nursing while we waited for my milk to come in - you would either keep breaking your own latch or would latch and not suck. You'd keep falling asleep, and we'd have to pump your little arm to keep you awake. So we started supplementing you with formula - and a good thing, too, since you ended up with some jaundice. You've been staying with Grandma at her work for the last two nights - I'm going to hopefully get to pick you up from the Special Care Nursery at some point this morning. I can't wait to have you home with us again.

Here's a photo of you catching some rays:








We both just about died from cute when we saw your position - you are adorable when you sleep like that, and we're enchanted by your hairy back and shoulders. But don't get used to that position - when you come home, it's back on the back for you, sweet pea. :) We are a little concerned that apparently you can already turn yourself over, though! You did it once while in your little tanning bed, and we are both impressed and a little freaked out. You're also gaining weight very well, and I'm sure you're going to be a chunky little monkey soon.

Just before you were readmitted, we had an appointment with a lactation consultant, and I think it was worth every penny. She gave us some great tips, and you showed her how quickly you could learn. As my milk is now pretty much in, I am confident that you'll get the hang of this soon. And in the meantime, I'm happy to pump for you. We have some great tools for teaching sessions with you - I'm looking forward to the time when you'll be able to nurse like a champ, like I know you can. You've showed us a couple of times.

We've only had one night with you at home, and it went pretty well. At one point you were rather unhappy, and it was because you were kind of gassy. But Daddy took you into his arms and settled you onto his chest, and you fell asleep right away. You hung out together in front of the TV in the middle of the night for about an hour and a half. I've known for some time that sleeping on Daddy's chest is a magical thing - I'm so glad you've figured it out.

We've decided that we'd rather have you sleep in our room for now, so we're building you a bassinet out of a drawer. Daddy is going to find some fairly hard-cell foam, about an inch thick, to create a little mattress for you, and we'll set you up on the dresser where we can get to you quickly, but still both sleep in the same bed.

So far, I'm recovering well from your birth. My ankles are incredibly swollen, but if I keep walking and drinking lots of water, that should go away. My back is also pretty sore - a combination of sore muscles from labour, and finding my way through nursing. We had lots of compliments in the hospital about how great the muscle tone in my stomach is - I was pleased that I worked so hard to get into good shape to carry you. And it was good that I kept up with my yoga.

As I said, I'll tell you about how you were born soon, but I wanted to say one thing about your Daddy. Moe, he is an incredible man. He takes such good care of both of us, and has been totally amazing this past week. I didn't expect anything less, because I know how awesome he is, but I am overwhelmed by his love for us. You have an incredible role model in him, my love. And don't ever doubt that he loves you from the bottom of his heart.

He's back at work today, but I know he's going to rush home at the end of the day at top speed to see you.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Special Care

Yesterday evening we had to re-admit our little guy to the Special Care Nursery at the Ottawa Civic Hospital. He is showing signs of jaundice, and his bilirubin levels aren't what they should be. So he went in for some time under a special lamp that will treat this. He's going to be fine - this is just a minor setback.

I won't get into what it was like to have to leave him there overnight. Maybe some day I'll blog about it, but not today.

On the bright side, both Bundy and I are better rested this morning. They are going to keep him until tomorrow for sure, so we'll have another night with a full sleep.

We're headed there now to spend the day with him.

The fact that his grandmother is one of the most senior nurses at the Special Care Nursery is also very reassuring - if I have to leave him somewhere, there's nowhere I'd feel more comfortable doing it.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Introducing...

Moe. :) (We aren't using his real name on the internet.)

A birth story and other thoughts will come, but in the meantime...

Born Saturday, February 20, 2010 at 1:08 am. Weighed in at 6lbs and 3oz of total awesome.

We are completely in love.

We got home Monday afternoon, around 2:45 pm. Tomorrow's adventures include a pediatric appointment and a date with a lactation consultant.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Update

 We're going in for 6pm. See you on the other side.

Oh, ok.

You know how I've said a few times that we have become the experts in "not according to plan"?

Good thing.

Two doctors confirmed pre-eclampsia today. I'll be induced some time in the next 48 hours.

(Hello, Baconfest Baby!)

In the meantime, I have some paper work to fill out regarding cord blood, a bag to pack, and my feet to get off of.

Back to the doctor today...

So I had an appointment yesterday with Dr S, as Dr P is off this week. My blood pressure was higher than it should have been. So he ordered blood work, and asked me to come in again today to double check it.

I warned him that the high result was likely due to something that happened on the way to the appointment. (While pulling out of the garage, I dinged my passenger-side mirror and broke some of the plastic, which caused me to sit in my car in my driveway and cry for 5 minutes because that's what happens when you damage your new car and you're nine months pregnant and full of emotional hormones.) Also, I was a bit dehydrated - I haven't mastered the "drink water while at home" thing yet. But we now have a fresh jug on the cooler, and I'll get with the program. (I think I may have subconsciously just gotten tired of peeing all the time.)

Anyway, I'll head back there today for 11:45, and hopefully the blood pressure will be normal again.

It scuppers some plans I'd made to go and see Reg this morning, but it may be just as well. Bundy said we could go see him together on Sunday morning - and that this would probably be the last visit for a while. I just don't have the energy these days.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Dear Moe (37 Weeks)

Hello, darling, and welcome to 37 weeks. Although your due date is March 10, it's around this time that all bets are off and you could decide to show up at any point. You're losing your vernix and your lanugo now, and are apparently settling into the bottom of my pelvis. Rumour also has it that you're about 6.5 lbs.

I've noticed my belly getting bigger this week, for sure, and I'm making more frequent (and anti-climactic) trips to the bathroom. So far, I still have a belly button, though! But I have a feeling that my "no stretch mark honeymoon" will come to an end this next week as you grow even bigger.

I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon, and then I pick up the cord blood collection kit. We'll keep that right next to the labour and delivery bag to bring to the hospital. Your nursery is pretty much ready, although I have to confess feeling somewhat overwhelmed this week by the sheer amount of STUFF we have for you - people have been so generous that I'm sure we have more clothes than you could ever wear. I put together your bouncy swing yesterday, your blackout blinds have been installed in the windows, my trundle bed is in place and made, and I went out and got a few baskets to store the ridiculous amount of baby blankets we have for you. :) You are well taken care of, small sir, in the baby blanket department.

Monday was my first day of leave (although it officially starts next Monday - this week is some accumulated vacation and overtime) and it's been really nice to be home during the day. I worked very hard yesterday, but was able to lie down on the couch around 2:30 pm, which helped a lot. Today I took it easy in the morning, and plan to scoot around and get things done this afternoon. Tomorrow, I'm going to see Reg in the morning, and on Friday, Granny and I are going shopping for some last minute stuff.

I feel quite tired a lot of the time, with spurts of energy here and there, of which I try and take advantage. But whenever it feels like it is getting to be too much, I just look down at my belly and think of you in there, and everything is fine again. :)

We love you and are so looking forward to meeting you. xoxo

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Yikes

Ok, I'm going to make a confession here. I had a moment today where I was totally, completely and utterly overwhelmed by the sheer amount of STUFF that has taken over my house. I'm grateful for every gift, every warm wish, every hand-me-down, and every item that has been given to us, because they came with love. But holy Hannah, there is a lot of stuff. (That is a whole lot of love!)

We have more clothes than we could ever use. And like an amateur, I have detagged most of them. This week at work, I was unable to come back to my desk after a bathroom break without finding another gift that had been left. And please, don't think I'm ungrateful - people have been so generous and we appreciate it - but it is a little overwhelming.

So I think I'll stop detagging everything and perhaps make a little trip to Toys R Us to return some stuff - apparently, they are quite good about taking things back without a receipt - and get store credit for other stuff when we need it.

Part of the problem, I know, is that I've been so sick this week and haven't been able to devote any attention to the house. We missed garbage and recycling this week. I still have a gingerbread house sitting on top of my fridge. (And there's a chunk of pirate cake in my garage. LOL.) So the baby stuff is sitting among all the other stuff that normally clutters up our house.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Dear Moe (36 Weeks)

Hello, darling. Sorry I'm late with this week's letter, but I've caught a nasty cold and wasn't up to writing yesterday. In fact, I wasn't up to doing much except sleeping.

But I definitely wanted to write you today to congratulate you on getting to 36 weeks - we're officially 9 months along, and into the home stretch. By next week, you'll be considered "full term" and could be born very safely at any time. But I'd ask you to give me a couple of weeks of leave, ok, darling? We have stuff we need to finish up before you join us on the outside. :)

We're at the point now where we're going to get that hospital bag packed, and have it ready to go. Daddy's going to assemble that last item of nursery furniture, and I'll put away all the rest of your little clothes. I have some thank you cards that I'd really like to get done before you join us, as I don't think I'll have the time or energy once you're here. Who wants to write thank you notes when they can stare at you instead? And Jen and Albert are stopping by briefly on Saturday to install your car seat. (It used to be theirs, so they are the experts.)

Next week we have a doctor's appointment, and I have to get tested for group B streptococcus. I could carry it, and if I do, it just means that I'll need to take some antibiotics so I don't pass it on to you when you're born.

Last weekend, our friend Becka came by and took some lovely photos of us and my belly. We saw the unedited proofs and are very, very happy. Here's one that she edited for us right away.

Sending you tons of love, my darling. You're still growing steadily, and I'll do my best to keep eating right to keep you in the pink. It's hard to believe that in another month, you'll be here with us. We can't wait. xoxo

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Dear Moe (35 Weeks)

Hiya, sweetie. One more week and we'll be 9 months along. Another five weeks until you're full term. We saw you yesterday in an ultrasound, and you're looking great. You're in the 50th percentile for size, which is perfect, and weigh about 5 pounds and change. And we confirmed that you are indeed head down, and hopefully you'll stay that way. No backflips for you, ok? :)

I have seven and a half days of work left, not that I'm counting. I'm really looking forward to my leave. I find I get pretty tired by about 2:00 pm, and my back gets rather achey after sitting in a chair all day.

But I have managed to keep puttering around in the evenings, for the most part - last night I washed a bunch more teeny tiny clothes. I still have about three more loads to go! Your nursery is coming along nicely (although our spare room is now filling up with stuff). I set up your baby monitor, and we have a CD player for you so you can listen to music. Sometimes, when I'm getting ready for work in the morning, I'll just slip into your room for a moment and look around in awe.

We're taking the steps required to bank your cord blood when you are born. I hope you'll never need it, but it gives us some peace of mind to know that if you do, it's there.

I think this week I'll start drinking raspberry leaf tea. (They say you can start drinking it at 32 weeks, but I thought I'd wait a bit later just to be safe.) I'll bring some to the hospital, too, to drink during labour. It is supposed to ease labour and help get the uterus ready for labour. Hey, whatever makes it easier for you to come and join us on the outside. :)

I'm really excited for this weekend - Becka is going to come over and take some photos of my belly. When you're older, I thought it might be fun for you to see the belly you called home for 40 weeks. Plus, this has just been such a wonderful time in our lives that we'd like to document it properly. You are our dream come true, Moe. We can't wait to meet you.

It was funny, Moe. Yesterday at the doctor's appointment, we were seen by a medical student. After measuring you, checking my blood pressure, and asking various questions, she said, "Well, you guys are pretty boring!"

I think she meant that things were going very routinely. But I laughed and said, "Well, the beginning of this journey was filled with all kinds of interesting, so we're very happy to be boring now." She glanced at our chart and saw that you were conceived by IVF and blushed, "Yeah, I guess boring's good."

You'll never be boring to us, sweetie. But we're very happy that things are going along so well, and we hope that your arrival will be "routine", too. But whatever happens, your arrival could never be boring or "uneventful" - everything about you is so exciting to us!

In the meantime, keep growing (and staying in that 50th percentile, if possible - what a nice, reasonable size!), keep kicking, and keep soaking up our love.